Being an adult is hard in general. But being one in a family who were raised, and then raised you, with certain expectations, is even harder.
From the get go we are constantly being drummed, or maybe brainwashed is the correct term, with certain expectations we will grow to accomplish, or should accomplish anyway and heaven forbid we don’t do as we were told!
It starts from around the age of 14. We are legally allowed to get an after school job at 14 & 9 months to start earning our own money to save up for the future (according to the parental’s). But they can’t wait the last 9 months, so we have to start applying for every possible job we can think of so they have our resume’ ready for when we are the appropriate age.
Little do they know that companies throw away all the candidates who aren’t eligible at the time of application, but you do it anyway to keep them happy.
Anyway, you get a job (after you resubmit your resume’ again) when you’re at the right age. All is good. The parental’s are happy.
For now that is.
Then you turn 16. It’s time to get your licence. “Make sure you book your L’s test before you turn 16, so you can go on your actual birthday”. Seriously-what’s the hurry people?! What if I feel like I’m not ready to get behind the wheel of a moving vehicle? It doesn’t matter, because the parental’s say you are ready.
So you go for the test (on your birthday) and you fail. What a disappointment you are to the family. Never mind, book it again for tomorrow. These things can’t wait, obviously.
You finally get your L’s, but this continues on until your get your full licence.
Then you turn 18.You are technically an adult. You can vote. You have finished school, might possibly know what you want to do afterwards, if not it doesn’t matter too much because that’s not the important issue here. Instead, the first question they ask is:
“When are you going to find a nice boy and settle down?”
Clearly that’s what I’m thinking about as soon as I finish school. But the parental’s are clever. As strict as you always thought they were (and made themselves out to be) while you were growing up, you automatically think they will make you come home early on a Friday night,but no. They let you stay out as long as you like with no curfew, because this way they are giving you more of a chance to find a boy!
So eventually you do find a boy. You bring him home to meet the parental’s and then the next question comes out:
“When are you going to get married?”
Talk about pressure! It’s like they are still reliving their stone age days.
But eventually the day comes when you do get married and of course, they couldn’t be happier.
That is until their next question comes out:
“When are you going to make me a grandparent?”
Well that’t where keeping the parental’s happy has stopped. Although they make it their job to bring it up as often as they can, the fact is the pressures and expectations of family will never stop.
You will never have their full approval on anything you do because you havn’t done it their way.
Even if we had a baby tomorrow, the next question will be:
“When are you having another one?”